Vive la différence

Some good ones………
 

Bookseller conducting a market survey asked a woman – 
“Which book has helped you most in your life?”
The woman replied, “My husband’s checkbook!!”

A prospective husband in a bookstore 
“Do you have a book called 
‘Husband – the Master of the House?’" 
Salesgirl: “Sir, fiction, and comics are on the 1st floor!”

Someone asked an old man: 
“Even after 70 years, you still call your wife – 
darling, honey, luv. What’s the secret?" 
Old man: “I forgot her name and I’m scared to ask her."

Pharmacist to a customer: 
“Sir, please understand, to buy an anti-depression pill 
you need a proper prescription ...
Simply showing the marriage certificate 
and wife’s picture is not enough!

For MEN.....and WOMEN with a bit of humour ??
A man was granted two wishes by God. 
He asked for the best drink & the best woman ever. 
Next moment he got mineral water & Mother Teresa.

There are 3 kinds of men in this world. 
Some remain single and make wonders happen. 
Some have girlfriends and see wonders happen. 
Rest get married and wonder what happened!

Wives are magicians. 
They can change anything into an argument.

Why do women live a Better, Longer & Peaceful Life, 
compared to men?
A very INTELLIGENT student replied: 
"Because Women don't have a wife!"

COOL MESSAGE BY A WIFE: 
Dear Mother-in-law, Don't teach me how to handle my children. 
I am living with one of yours and he needs a lot of improvement!?

When a married man says, I WILL THINK ABOUT IT - 
what he really means is that he doesn't know his wife's opinion yet.

A lady says to her doctor: 
"My husband has a habit of talking in his sleep! 
What should I give him to cure it?"
The doctor replies: 
"Give him an opportunity to speak when he's awake! "