General A STORY

2009.10.13 01:41

이한중*65 Views:3888

A STORY

Bruce and Emily have been married over 65 years.
Bruce was an intern, and Emily a student nurse when they married.
Bruce is 89 years old, and Emily 86.
They have 6 children, 18 grandchildren and 8 great grandchildren.
Bruce was my mentor, a friend, a golf partner and my patient.
Emily had the perfect golf swing and played golf with Bruce on Sundays.
Emily also became my patient.
I've known them over forty years and their children many years.
I remember like yesterday, one late evening in 1966
when I was one of the first year medical residents, and
he handed to me a textbook of electrocardiography to read.
He let me, the first year resident, read the EKGs he was assigned to read,
and corrected them later.
We struck a lasting friendship that lasted almost half a century.

Some ten years ago Emily began to show early signs of Alzheimer's disease.
I watched the unrelenting progression of the disease.
It has taken every imagination, intelligence and common sense
of Bruce, his children and me as a treating physician to deal with
the ups, downs, and the unexpected of the terrible disease.
Finally, Emily settled down in a group home in the last year.
Through all these trials and tribulations,
Bruce who used to play golf with such a devotion over 60 some years
stopped playing and would say, "I played golf enough in my life."
He would devote himself one hundred percent to the care of Emily.
He would start the day by going to the church to pray every morning.
Once Emily settled at a group home some 20 miles away,
he would go there every day, sat next to Emily holding her hands,
and every now and then reminiscing the past whether Emily hears it or not.
When Emily doesn't respond, he would say the words she would've said.

Then one day I received a phone call from his oldest son, Bob.
Bruce got lost a number of times when he was driving to the place
Emily is staying.
Bruce all of sudden started writing hundreds of checks to every charity that
is asking for donation.
This is the most unusal behavior according to the son.
In short, Bruce is showing the clear signs of Alzheimer's disease.
To make a long story short,
the family and I are preparing Bruce to enter the group home where
Emily has been staying.

Bruce has been a mentor for my medical profession,
and more importantly a mentor for my life journey.
I watched him eating and digesting faithfully every word of marriage vows.
He showed me what the marriage is all about and
what the family is all about and
finally what the life is all about in his own way.
His accomplishments in his life are too many to list here.
He was the wittiest man, always ready with intelligent jokes.
He was the oldest, active golfer and the most popular guy at our club.
Of course, he was one of the past presidents of our golf club.
Some twenty years ago he and four others invited me to apply to join the club.
So I applied but got rejected because two of the ten board directors voted no.
Bruce wrote a most scathing letter to the board indicating the fact that
they voted me down because I was an asiatic.
Not only that but also he called every one of ten board directors to make sure
to tell them how shameful it is that we have two racists on the board.
Because of his letter, the board held a special meeting and
passed my application unanimously.
I still have the copy of his letter, which was signed by all five sponsors.
It was one of those eye-opening life experiences for me.

I am forever indebted to Bruce, who will be in my prayer for the rest of my life.

I want to

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Comment 3

운영자

2009.10.13 03:54

Was there a such racial problem in Detroit 20 years ago? One never knows.
I joined my country club in 1985 in the "southern redneck state" of Kentucky
and had no problem. But I guess I was the only one specialty surgeon in the town.
They probably couldn't refuse me. I felt there were rednecks around me.
But I jumped in and got mixed with them. No further problems.
Isn't this a bit too late for the fall color in northern Michigan?
We had unusuallly cold weather and snow here and we missed all those fall hikings.
The fall colors are pretty well gone here I guess. But I will try a few hikes if weather gets better.
It's a good time for picture-taking with the background of high mountains covered with snow.

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이한중*65

2009.10.13 04:31

Thanks for the comment.
In Detroit surburb, we still have the clubs for wasps only.
Our club is now completly integrated, and is considered to be the most liberal club in Detroit.
The mayor of Detroit who is black and I joined the club at the same time.
He was the only black golfing member and I was the only asiatic in 1989.
Since then, we've had a women president and a black president.

Believe it or not, here in Michigan the fall color in Northern Michigan
is said to be at the peak this week.

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운영자

2009.10.13 09:28

It's rather strange that the fall color arrived about 2 weeks later than usual this year.
The same is true in the western states.
Could it be the general warming trend of the earth or just one exceptional year?
Glaciers have been retreating in the northern and southern hemispheres,
and they are finding new islands in the northern sea as the overlying ice sheets melt away.
If it goes on, the lower lying coastal towns may be going under water sooner than we thought.

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