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General Reasons Not To Mess With Children

2009.11.15 07:58

이한중*65 Views:6331



Reasons Not To Mess With Children



    A little girl was talking
    to her teacher about whales.
    The teacher said
    it was physically impossible
    for a whale to swallow a human
    because even though
    it was a very large mammal
    its throat was very small. The little girl stated that
    Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
    Irritated, the teacher reiterated
    that a whale could not swallow a human;
    it was physically impossible.
    The little girl said,
    'When I get to heaven
    I will ask Jonah'.
    The teacher asked,
    'What if Jonah went to hell?'
    The little girl replied,
    'Then you ask him'.


    A Kindergarten teacher was observing
    her classroom of children while
    they were drawing. She would occasionally
    walk around to see each child's work.
    As she got to one little girl
    who was working diligently,
    she asked what the drawing was.
    The girl replied, 'I'm drawing God..'
    The teacher paused and said,
    'But no one knows what God looks like.'
    Without missing a beat, or looking up from
    her drawing, the girl replied,
    'They will in a minute.'


    A Sunday school teacher was discussing
    the Ten Commandments with
    her five and six year olds.
    After explaining the commandment
    to 'honour' thy Father and thy Mother,
    she asked, 'Is there a commandment
    that teaches us how to treat
    our brothers and sisters?'
    Without missing a beat
    one little boy (the oldest of a family)
    answered, 'Thou shall not kill.'


    One day a little girl was sitting
    and watching her mother do
    the dishes at the kitchen sink.
    She suddenly noticed that
    her mother had several strands
    of white hair sticking out
    in contrast on her brunette head,
    She looked at her mother
    and inquisitively asked,
    'Why are some of your hairs white, Mum?'
    Her mother replied,
    'Well, every time that
    you do something wrong and
    make me cry or unhappy,
    one of my hairs turns white.'
    The little girl thought about this revelation
    for a while and then said,
    'Mummy, how come
    ALL of grandma's hairs are white?'


    The children had all been photographed,
    and the teacher was trying to
    persuade them each
    to buy a copy of the group picture.
    'Just think how nice
    it will be to look at it
    when you are all grown up and
    say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,'
    or 'That's Michael, he's a doctor.'
    A small voice at the back of the room
    rang out, 'And there's the teacher,
    she's dead...    '


    A teacher was giving a lesson
    on the circulation of the blood.
    Trying to make the matter clearer,
    she said, 'Now, class,
    if I stood on my head, the blood,
    as you know, would run into it,
    and I would turn red in the face.'
    'Yes,' the class said.
    'Then why is it that while I am standing up
    right in the ordinary position
    the blood doesn't run into my feet?'
    A little fellow shouted,
    'Cause your feet ain't empty.'


    The children were lined up in the cafeteria
    of a Catholic elementary school for lunch.
    At the head of the table was a large pile
    of apples. The nun made a note,
    and posted on the apple tray:
    'Take only ONE . God is watching.'
    Moving further along the lunch line,
    at the other end of the table was
    a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.
    A child had written a note,
    'Take all you want.
    God is watching the apples.'


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